Apparently, I Would Slap My Father

Have you heard about this? It's in every newspaper.

The articles, such as this from the New York Times (try if you need a password): Op-Ed Columnist - Would You Slap Your Father? If So, You’re a Liberal, basically describes how liberals and conservatives express the emotion of disgust at different things.

Examples are how disgusted a person would feel when stepping barefoot on an earthworm or smelling urine in a tunnel. Conservatives feel more disgusted than liberals. Perhaps the smell of urine is the real reason why conservatives can't be public defenders.

For example, the other day in court, I had an old man client. He asked me if he could go to the bathroom before his case was called. He came back into the courtroom with the entire front of his pants wet. Was I disgusted? Nah, more like amused. Did I shake his hand? No, I'm liberal, not crazy.

Anyway, I can see it now. A whole new branch of voir dire questions. "Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, I just found a fly in water. I'm going to keep drinking it anyway. Raise your hand if you're disgusted. Your honor, I would like to use my peremptory challenges on the people raising their hands."

If you want to try the questions yourselves, they're at YourMorals.Org. (You have to register, I don't think bugmenot is going to help you for this one.)

Ounce of Prevention

I try to be a holistic attorney.

Generally, the younger the client, the more time I spend on the little extras - reminding them about court dates, reminding them about things they can do between court dates to help their case, helping them figure out how to avoid further legal trouble.

For one recent young client, I spent a lot of time talking to him and his family about what to do when they felt the police were harassing them in the neighborhood. I've represented him on some tickets he had outstanding. I got him signed up for a college prep program. I got him an application for a summer job. I've spent my waiting time in court helping him with his homework and reviewing his job applications and resume.

But when I met his young girlfriend today in court, all I could think was "If I don't google 'where to find free condoms' and print the list for this client, all my effort will have wasted."