Today I pretended that I knew something about football and talked to guys about the game.
"How about that guy Booty?" I asked.
"Yeah, he was good."
"Did the announcers say 'Booty is wide open?'"
"Maybe they did, right? Maybe they said, 'Booty is wide open,' right? You don't know everything they said, do you?"
"Well, that wouldn't make any sense. Booty is a quarterback, he wouldn't be wide open."
"So, what you're saying is Booty was never wide open?"
"Ugh, just stop."
I also spent a lot of time thinking about women who might marry Booty and hyphenate their name. Let's see... do you think Jason Biggs has a sister?