When I was a kid, I thought that when I met God my questions for Him would mostly revolve around people and animals that died. Such as, "Why did you take my dog from me?" and "Why did you take my grandfather from me?" Pretty selfish, I know.
A few years ago, I thought that when I met God, I'd want to know about war and terrorism and people killing one another. And why He allows it. But, really, upon further review, I think that's probably out of God's hands. I think He set us on the right track, and when people go off that track and kill one another, God's probably not happy with it, but He's not really intervening or causing it either.
Now, when I meet God, I really only want to ask, "Why could some women have babies and others couldn't? Did you have a plan? Because I can't figure out how you thought it was a good one."
One friend of mine has been trying very hard to have a baby for a few years now. She's just the kind of person who would be a perfect mom. She's smart and sweet and caring, she's got a good husband and a good marriage. She does everything right. If there's a news story that says women need more of this vitamin or less of that mineral to get pregnant or have a good pregnancy or to have a healthy baby, she does it. It's just not working.
Other women that I know have recently had miscarriages and another woman's baby died just a few days after birth.
Meanwhile, all around us, there are women having babies who don't want them. I see it all the time. Women accused of crimes who get pregnant. Women who will deliver their babies in jail. Women who don't know who the father is. Women in violent relationships. Women with health problems that make them unable to care for a child. Women who leave their baby in a dumpster.
I'm not saying that some women deserve to get pregnant and others don't. I don't think that's for me to judge. I'm just saying that it doesn't really seem fair.
This isn't a biological or social or political debate question, although I know all of those things play into it. It's just something I've been thinking about a lot. If God has a plan, I'd like to know what it is.
I've left the comments open on this post, even though I wasn't sure I should. I know this could be a controversial topic, but I'm really not open to a debate right now. Sorry, I'm just not. It's my blog and I'll debate if I want to. Please, sensitive comments only. Thank you.