Naked Napper

When I was in high school, there was a boy who had transferred from another state. In fact, if I remember correctly, he was one of those boys that transferred from school to school his whole life.

Anyway, one day, he was sitting at our lunch table, and somehow we were all talking about naptime. You know, a conversation like, "Aaah, remember the good old days when we had naptime after lunch? Now we have to go to History." And everyone said, "Aaah, yes, naptime" except this transfer student.

Transfer student said, "Naptime? I hated naptime. It was so gross, it felt all weird." Gross? Weird? "Yeah, you had to take your clothes off and sleep on that mat." Take your clothes off? I sort of remember taking my shoes off. Maybe socks if that's more comfortable. But clothes? "Yeah, everyone had to get down to their underwear..."

And it was right there, at the high school lunch table, that the transfer student realized maybe something wasn't right at his daycare. We all stopped laughing and the transferred student vowed he was going to ask his mother that night what kind of daycare she had sent him to.

Fast forward to today. Well, last night actually:

The doctor said I have scoliosis. A slight curvature of the spine.

Everyone has that. That's very common actually.

If it's so common, then why did they screen us for it in high school?

What do you mean?

They had this thing. All of the girls had to go to the nurse's office, take off our shirts, and bend over so a doctor could look at our spines.

Was this a man examining everyone?


And you thought this was for scoliosis?

Uh oh, did I just have a realization moment like my friend, the naked napper? Did anyone else have these "screenings" at their school?


  1. Oh yeah, all schools had those. I don't recall it in high school, but definitely in middle school. There was a Judy Blume book about a girl who had to wear a back brace, the name escapes me right now, but I was always convinced that it would be me, and those examinations caused me much anxiety.

  2. Yes, everyone had that but I got out of it because my dad would write me a note (he's a dr.). Come to think of it, I got out of doing just about everything - religion class, getting flouride treatments, mass during lent. . .

    But the dude with the naked naptime, don't you wonder where he is now?

  3. The scoliosis checks were ickily real. I recall the humiliation. Age 12, maybe 13. Line up, strip to your waist, and bend over for a doctor you've never met to run his hand up and down your spine.

    What a waste of municipal funds.

    Naked napping? Now THAT's something to look into.

  4. I don't remember that.

    Maybe I blocked it from my memory, but I swear I don't remember doing that.

    As for the naked napping.....that kinda gave me a hinky feeling. Although I could go for it now ;) Just with my significant other, not a bunch of kids (of course)

    ok I'll just shut up now....

  5. Nah... that doesn't sound like one of those moments, especially if they examined everybody. An orthopedist told me once that it was common, and became a problem in 3 to 4 percent of the population, four times more frequently in females than males. They were probably just trying to make sure everyone was okay. Then again, they could just be a bunch of pervs. You never really know.

  6. Ooh how can I not respond, with a name like Nudum Pactum!

    To borrow from a recently read case that incidentally speaks to the issue, ``Education Law section 905(1) requires school authorities in the State of New York to examine students between 8 and 16 years of age from scoliosis at least once in each school year." Uhr v. East Greenbush Central School District, 720 N.E.2d 886 (N.Y. 1999).

    And, now that I've painted myself as a total gunner, I promise never to cite another case in comments ever again.


  7. Yes our school had those checks.

  8. We had them for boys and girls. Stripped down to our undies in the locker room.

  9. I seem to remember the girls putting their shirts on backward at my school.

  10. Hey! Now that you mention it, maybe I remember the girls wearing their shirts backwards too. . .

  11. Yep, we had to do the same thing and not a STITCH of clothing allowed up top! lol

  12. Um, yeah, we had scoliosis checking. It was always a male doctor and we had to strip down to our undies and tank tops. It was so embarrassing. Even though all the girls went together, they lined you up and the line would go out into the hallway. Um, HI! I'm standing in the hallway freezing my chicken legs off and having the 6th grade boys stare at all of us!
    Eventually, they changed the rules and everyone had to wear speedo bathing suits to school that day. Yeah, that makes it SO much better!

  13. I had jury duty once. It sucked. The judge was a real pompous guy. Anyhow, this kid allegedly threw something at a convenience store owner. I had reasonable doubt and wouldn't have thought the kid guilty until his lawyer had him testify. His story just seemed far fetched and it contradicted the line of questioning the lawyer used on the owner. If he had just said something simpler I would have said , "ok it's one guy's word against another" but he spun this yarn on how the guy threw him down and was attacking him with a stool and while he was on the ground his hand came across a bottle and he threw it hitting the guy.
    They took me and a lady off the jury as an alternate and locked us in a seperate room when deliberations started. I asked the other alternate what she thought and she said, "We're not allowed to talk about it." which only solidified in my mind that she was a moron who probably has left the tags on her mattress because she doesn't want to get in trouble. The kid wound up getting off. I left thinking this was a waste of my week and that the legal system was just a self perpetuating jobs program.

  14. Hey, Stopher - that's a random comment when we're talking about scoliosis and whatnot. =)

    Anyway, the rest of you: What are you talking about with the shirts backward? We definitely just took our shirts off. What good would a backwards shirt do? I mean, I guess if everyone had button-down shirts on, but how many women wear button-down shirts on any given day? Unless they were told to ahead of time. I'm confused.

  15. Sorry, I was actually commenting on the other post when you asked if anyone had jury duty, but I must have clicked the wrong link and I'm not even blonde. =)

  16. Gus, I'm happy to have a gunner as a reader/commenter. It lets me be lazy and say things like, "I remember this case... I don't remember the name of it, but maybe I have a gunner out there that can find it..."

  17. On that scoliosos thing, In my middle school i reamember we had that chaecked by a female doctor. All of the girls lined up in the middle of the hall and one by one she went down the row and collected our clothing. All of it! The boys were standing right there across the hall staring. I was so embarrased. But then when the girls were ready for revenge on the boys, they sent us into our classroom and the boys did it alone. I dont get it.

  18. Ya well I remember that all the girls went to the gym and had their spines checked while some of the guys had gym I was one of the guys who had gym and I'll say it was a little weird to have half naked girls getting their spines checked wile we had gym

    But the naked napping that's like some perverted daycare that kid went to

    Well bye and giggity