I sometimes put Burt's Bees Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream on my lips. Do you think that's ok?
Yes, I realize that they make lip stuff. In fact, I'm a big fan of that too. But I don't have that next to my bed, I have the cuticle stuff next to my bed.
I checked out the ingredients and they all looked like lip-safe things. (Almond oil, beeswax, lemon oil, vitamin E, cocoa butter, rosemary extract, beta-carotene, that sort of thing.) And I don't swallow much of it, but if I get a little on my tongue, it tastes alright. And I was thinking, it must be safe since the label doesn't say anything like "Do not put on lips."
Then I thought, does that make me one of the dumb people that they have to put dumb labels on things for? You know, the people they're thinking of when they put "Remove plastic, eat fruit while still fresh" on the instructions for a fruit basket. Or when they write "Do not put beans up nose!" on jelly beans?
Do you think there was a time when all of the Burt's Bees people were sitting around with their lawyers and the lawyers said, "Maybe you should put, 'Do not apply to lips'" and then the Burt's Bees people said, "Nah, it goes without saying. After all, it says cuticle cream. And we sell lip stuff. Our customers aren't that dumb."
So, do I have any science-type readers who could check the list of ingredients and let me know whether or not it'll kill me? Either way, I've already been putting it on my lips for a few days now. If I stop posting suddenly, you'll know it killed me. And you should arrange for a lawyer to sue on behalf of my estate, of course.