Proctologist Wannabe

I have a hard time putting my work away at night or on the weekends. Honestly, I have to bring work home many nights if I want to keep my head above water (and my clients out of jail). And my clients and my cases and my co-workers are things that I think about all day. So, sometimes it's hard to just stop thinking about trial strategies or things I need to do.

But this weekend, I didn't bring any work home. And I made a decision that I wasn't going to think about it, or talk about it, or call and check my voice mail.

Last night, the boyfriend and I went to a wedding. As we do every weekend. Seriously, every weekend I'm either at bridal shower, a bachelorette party, a baby shower, or a wedding.

My friend that was getting married was a friend from law school. She and I had actually been partners in a criminal defense clinic.

Before the reception I realize that the only other people that I know (both also from law school), are in the bridal party. Which means that the boyfriend and I would be sitting at a table of strangers. Which I also realize means they're going to ask me what I do. Which always leads to the inevitable annoying question, "How can you represent someone when you know they're guilty?"

Me: "Can't I just lie and tell them I'm something totally uninteresting? And then they won't ask any follow-up questions?"
Boyfriend: "But what happens when they ask how you know the bride?"
Me: "Oh, yeah."

So, we spent the rest of the wedding coming up with jobs where people don't ask follow-up questions. For example, proctologist. No one is going to ask you "Oh, interesting, how did you get involved in that field?" Especially not over dinner.

Oh, and I know you want to read about this, but I had my most interesting bathroom experience at this wedding reception. Get this - the floors in the bathroom stalls were mirrored. I mean, nothing I haven't seen before, but it's just surprising when you look down and see something like that looking back up at you.

1 comment:

  1. i can imagine that conversation:

    stranger: so, what do you do?
    you: i'm a proctologist
    stranger: and how do you know the bride?
    you: i treated her for this recurring case of hemerroids.
    stranger: oh (silence, then turns to boyfriend). and what do you do.
    boyfriend: i'm a urologist specializing in erectile dysfunction. the groom is a long-time patient, er, i mean friend
    (stony silence for remainder of evening)